4.01.2012

19.45


 ***
I just realized yesterday that I hadn't done an "all the months" post for this month...
and well, I think I managed to squeeze it in just in time for the new month...without a minute to spare 
almost!
We have been spending so much time outside it is almost a shame to be stuck inside on the computer.
We have broken in the back patio already with lots of picnics-breakfast, lunch and dinner...time has 
been of no consequence...we have also been playing in the garden...preparing the ground for new life...
welcoming in this season with open arms.

Forgive me if I am being lured by the sweet scent and inviting lure of spring.
You don't blame me do you?

***



  Boys,
I am excited about so many things, but lately what makes me most excited is watching you
run through the grass barefoot...picking "berries" and finding sticks to use for you imaginary drums.
Watching catch frogs and lizards and talking to them the way that boys would do. Having toddler conversation and enjoying each other in the midst of all your discoveries...captain and his sidekick ...
my little tom sawyer and huckleberry finn....
Both of you just soaking in the sun and the nature around you...
learning so much more than you even realize.
You make me so proud.
You remind me to remain young at heart
no matter how old I get...
to just be able to lie in the grass...
and dream.

 

Luca,
at night you pray that you may "sleep with the angels all around you" as you squeeze my hand 
with your little one and peek at me through the corner of your eyes....
that thought makes you happy.
You have graduated from the bath to the "shower" at your very own request...
preferring to imitate your dad as much as humanly possible...
you compare your muscles to his, your stature...
at dinner you measure your growth progress by how
many bites of food you have taken....
and I giggle with delight...knowing full well that it won't
be long until that all becomes reality...and those nick marks
on the door frame reflect a man and not a 3 foot boy.
You cup my face in your hands and tell me you love me.
I cannot usually keep myself from crying when you do that
...watching a man in a small boys body right before my eyes....
the gentle understanding beyond your years.
You struggle with the "why" behind everything lately...
and I step back and realize that your struggle is not solely
in disobedience but not knowing expectations...changes...growth...
you are learning and changing so much....and your little mind is trying to 
keep up. I hope beyond hope that I am enough....that I am everything you need.
That when you grow up you see how much I desired to be & do what was best...for both of us.
You have the heart of a thousand men....
you have so much love.
your smile could ease the deepest wound.


Canaan,
My little cuddle bug... I have witnessed so many changes in you lately. I am amazed by how you  have
bloomed in such a short amount of time. Your little feet are up and scouring for a new adventure...you are curious of everything and interested in being in the center of it all. You are strong and I find that to be so evident  in the things that you do. I love when you walk up beside me and place your hand in mine...I love to here your little voice say "tay too" (thank you) throughout the day...and marvel that this little bundle I must have just been carrying around yesterday...has become a toddler....a speaking toddler. I watch you struggle to get your feelings across...not knowing yet how to fully do that...and I feel terrible for you....looking forward to the day when words will come easily and your spirit will ease. You like it when I kiss your feet before bedtime ... giggling the entire time. You are so rough-and-tumble you  constantly have bumps and bruises...you are all boy that is for sure! This month has been so exciting for me because you have been much more willing to take pictures...you have even started saying, "cheese" when you see me with the camera... I am on cloud 9 to be sure. You love to wear flip flops and you believe there is a frog in your belly button....the bird outside our patio has built a nest and you find it fascinating to go out and watch her intently...as she sits in the midst of her nest. You are so aware of so many things...and you are determined to learn about it all. Though, we must work on this eating business :) your dad is still the only person that can get you to eat....everything you don't like.... haha.... your dad likes to pick on me about it too! He thinks it is funny...haha I guess it kind of is :) My little adventurer. You are tough as they come...like a little bulldozer...but you are as sweet and loving as a teddy bear. The perfect combination I say. 

 XOXO,
Momma 

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